i think it’s time to kick this shit back up.

ratatata!

i lied when i interviewed jill scott a couple weeks back.

i told her i loved the new album, when in truth i thought it was just aiiiiiiiiight.

during our chat she mentioned how much some songs hurt while she sings them on stage; however in spite of this she has to sing them because they’re great songs. one of the tracks she mentioned was whenever you’re around. when the interview was over i cranked it up on my itunes and gave it my ears…really gave it my ears.

“I’ve been talking to this man
He’s been saying what I like and
He makes me smile,
When I’m down, so down

He says sweet things in my ear
All the things that I needed to hear
But that’s as far as it’s gone
I promise, I promise

But I enjoy it, I love it so
Cause it seems like I’m always alone
You’re at arms reach
But baby,
Where are you?
Where are you?

Cause I got this fire
Sweet and true
But I’m cold as ice when i’m around you

Cause I’m lonely
Whenever you’re around
Cause I’m lonely
Whenever you’re around

What happened to the wonderful thing we had?
It seems like you’re missing in action
And I’m tired, I’m tired
I’m tired, I’m tired, I’m tired, I’m tired

I don’t wanna lose this good life
But I ain’t scared
If I’m going to be the only one participating
in it

Cause I’m lonely
Whenever you’re around
Cause I’m lonely
Whenever”

her absolute class on this track has made this my song of the now.

“i enjoy it” is so tentative, so daring.

“this fire” is so strong.

“i’m tired…” is so weary.

maybe it touches me so much cos i’m still dealing with elements of these feelings my damn self. but that’s no reason to conclude her greatness on it isn’t the reason i’m connecting with the song. in fact the beauty is in her ability to relay her emotions so well that i can feel her on this. i can’t wait to see her perform this song in concert. i might not always love the songs she sings, but i have no beef with jill’s absolute wonderfulness. that woman really is the real thing.

“were talking about an artist made of nothing but quality .
NOW, does less work equal ‘not as important’ or’ not worthy of respect.’

please if i may speak freely…

freedom of speech is a great law and should be reinforced
but what the hell is you freely speaking about?

it is not against this governments laws to speak freely
but isnt their a univeral law in YOUR beleif that is against killing- with words?

rasta’s call it chant chant chant you down.

how many of you would go to work or school or church with no mask, make-up or fear .
stand before all and say , im going thru pain , be patient with me.

thats what she is on trial for?

ladies and gentleman , please look at this world more closely.
that woman is nothing but GOOD/ GOD./ PURE LIGHT.

just misunderstood.

artist/ celebs hate this position. ( to be misunderstood)
the scarf you took 10 years to create can be unravled in 13 seconds with one persons viral oppinion.

what do we love to do more than watch for people , who we consider great, to fall?
do it with someone else.

the new motto should be:
‘if you cant say something nice- come sit by me.’

we’re sick.
all of us.
LIBERATION starts with me.

we love you L. BOOGIE
one of the most important people of our time.

hiphop is bigger than religion
bigger than polotics
bigger than the government.

we got muslims, christians, hebrew israilites, budists, catholics, jews, blacks whites, asians latinos , men , women , rich and poor all on this board right now.

dont tell me this aint liberation .

now lets come up with a plan
cause ill be damned if my children end up in a world where we cant agree to disagree without WAR.
stop waging war against yourself first
stop waging war against your loved ones
and got damn it, by all means , stop fighting those who are brave enough to stand up
for creativity
for growth
FOR YOU
in this systematic , programmed, fear based society created to spawn complacient workers who compete to be last one standing on top of a big pile of filth that dont belong to you in the first place.

ill save the rest for another time.
and yes that goes for me too.

i loooove to have fun .
i also would love to kill ‘lucifer.’

time to make up our minds.
what we gone be?

just sayin.

excuse the typos”

me and my friend mr versace found ourselves at the V&A Museum for the annual Kulture2Couture fashion show. me and mrs height went to the Urban Fashion Awards last week and, due to the predominately white and sometimes middle-aged designers, we were thoroughly confused as to what “urban” meant. well Kulture2Couture leaves no doubt. This is a fashion show designed to showcase the talents of black designers. i did notice that the majority of the models were white, but hey: baby steps.

there were 17 designers in total and my favorites included saint-hill couture and deola sagoe. i’ll be back next year.

after going home and freshening up (well he did anyway) we met up again later and took ourselves to cargo. i’d never been to cargo before, it was pretty cool. however i didn’t appreciate having to line up outside to claim my pre-booked tickets, while those paying on the door just walked on through. um…aside from the £2 saving, where’s the bonus pour moi?

 so why were we at cargo? two words: FLYING LOTUS. oh. my. god.

this is hands down theee most AMAZING dj set i’ve ever witnessed. i thought i was just going to watch the dude spin some tracks, but i got soooooo much more (including a loss of hearing in my right ear). flylo played beats live, people. he jammed the cuff out to the music, people. he played a mash-up house version of his track tea leaf dancers, people. he had the crowd amped, people. it was incredible, people. too bad the show at brixton is cancelled, because if it wasn’t then i would have risked a gunshot wound and found myself down there to experience another dose of the magic.

if you don’t know who flying lotus is then get to know. and if he ever comes to your town: be there!

sunday:

on sunday i met up with spiderman and we went to the photography gallery in leicester square. the photography gallery has two buildings and the first one we went to had the shop in it. i spent far too much money on black & white postcards (i guess i collect them…i should probably buy some kind of scrapbook for the 100 or so that i have). we walked to the other building and found that it was closed. there was a slight sense of deja vu, as the last exhibition i took us to was closed. cue general teasing and spiderman telling me that i’m bad luck…

as we walked back towards the station his spidey senses picked up on a restaurant called abeno too (the sister restaurant of abeno). it’s a lovely japanese place with hot plates built into the tables. if you order from the okonomi-yaki menu, they cook it right in front of you. okonomi-yaki is a kind of pancake with egg, cheese, noodles and the meat or seafood of your choice (as well as lots of delicious hidden ingredients). i passed on it due to the fact that i don’t eat egg, but i ended up trying some of spiderman’s and it was GOOOOOOOOOOD! i will definitely have that next time.

more important than the food though, was the ethos behind the restaurant. in this part of japanese culture it is very important to share. everything we ordered came with two bowls or two plates, and when the manager saw that we were not sharing she came up to us and asked why. this is the reason i ended up trying the dish, and i really appreciated the importance of this. forget prayer, the family that eats okonomi-yaki together, stays together.

*she bows*

woman: stop bullying me, rhynn! i’m tired of your passive-aggressive behavior!

woman: no, i won’t be quiet! i hope they do call the police, if they don’t, i will!

woman: what more do you want? you can’t keep walking in and out of my life all the time. i’ve had enough!

did they really need to have this argument outside? this was some ghetto-ass behavior. two white people, in a well-to-do area of london, arguing on the street like they’re on jerry springer. steve! this argument went on for at least 40 minutes. 40 minutes of the same 5 points, 40 minutes of her shouting at the top of her lungs and him mumbling under his breath every now and then. is this what people do?

i don’t like arguing. some people might find that weird, considering i can be quite an acerbic witch at times, but i genuinely do not like confrontation. there’s not much in this life that i will argue to the death over. at some point i’m going to either a) agree to disagree or b) bow out of the argument all together (and perhaps out of your life). the thought of occupying such an emotionally intensive space for 40 minutes really scares me. and more than that, it makes me tired just thinking about it.

i can talk about our issues for hours, if need be. no, i don’t enjoy it, but i understand that it can be necessary. but there’s something very cynical about a blazing row, in my opinion. i know that by the time i get to that point, i am so buzzed on the adrenalin that NOTHING he says or does will bring me back down to neutral. it’s like asking a crack addict to kick the habit while they’re in the middle of their most intense high. and so when you get to the place of screaming and shouting like a wild banshee, it’s really all about you.

now would she have been screaming like that if rhynn was overtly aggressive? i doubt it. and that’s my other problem with screaming matches. we either both end up screaming, or i will end up screaming at you. the former will have me feeling nervous, and the latter will have me feeling like a bully. that’s a lose lose sitcheeation to me.

who knows? maybe rhynn had treated the mystery woman so badly that it was right that she was only thinking of herself at that moment. maybe what i heard last night was her emancipation, her own ‘i have a dream’ speech.

but last night confirmed something for me: if i ever have such a fight with anyone, you can be sure that it will be the first and last time.

nearly one month later, but it’s here. i collected it from my local post office this morning and read it on the way to work.

bill is wil’in! it’s funny cos there were parts i read and frowned at because the inherent defensive mechanism came to the fore, strapped and ready to buss. but then i thought: is this what you will tell your kids? and the answer was always yes.

one part had me laughing out loud on the bus though. i mean really laughing.

“Many of our kids don’t speak English….Everybody knows it’s important to speak English except for some young people you see hanging around on the corners.

…You can’t be a doctor telling your nurse, ‘Dat tumor be nasty.’“

lmao

ay yo, nurse laquita. dat tumor be nasty, yo. word up. holla at me with the results of the x-rizzle, soon as they come in. hit me on my 2way.

it’s parts like this that make me scratch my head a little though. these are the parts that make people question bill’s motives. there’s something very ‘us and them’ about it that doesn’t sit well with me. and yet i do find that i will most likely be saying all these things to my children. so what does that say about me? that may well be the most valuable question this book answers.

dis book be mad fun to read already, yo. crank dat!

i’m half browsing the web and half listening to her, so when she says something about leaving soon to make it back in time i say: ‘i hurrr dat’. she replies: ‘yeah, i should hurry up actually.’

lol

note to self: no ebonics at work.

and when i carry this idea through, lives will be changed.

i’m saying this here so that i can look back at this post in a year’s time and confirm how right i am.

end.

i used to love guy fawkes when i was a child. every year me and the fam would have friends and family over, light that bonfire in the back garden and let off some mighty fireworks.

every year i tell myself i am going to go and catch a professional display but it never happens. instead i’ve got in the habit of staying at home and watching the various displays my neighbors are having. see once those fireworks hit the sky, it is no longer their display, it is our display.

so thanks to my neighbors at number 49 for last night’s show.

it was almost like being invited.